Thoughts on turning... 40

I’m just gonna put it out there and get it over with, next month I’m turning 40. FORTY!!! It’s strange, I really remember my mum turning 40, I’d have been 10 (my eldest is 4). I remember mum frequently talking about how she didn’t feel her age, that she still felt like she was in her early 20s – and that revelation blew my mind, like she was 40 how could she possibly feel young! Of course, now I get it, now I’m looking 40 stark in the face, I can confirm, I don’t feel it either. I can’t say I feel 23 either, I feel more like 30, maybe 32 at a stretch.

I feel really uneasy about the impending date, but I try to keep reminding myself of the old adage ‘Old age is a privilege denied to many’ – my dear mum being one of them of course (passing away at 56). Every day that I get to live, to breathe, to spend time with my children and husband I’m grateful for.

What am I doing for my birthday? well, I still can’t decide! I feel like I should have some sort of party, but as I’m dairy and soya free, it’s really difficult (afternoon tea is my usual go-to). And with the kids in tow I’d have to be a day event. I just can’t decide, which means I’ll probably end up doing nothing.

As a family we are going away on a little stay-cation to Devon, staying at our first Airbnb, we’re really excited about this 😁 I’m pretty sure the hubby is getting me a KitchenAid Artisan mixer for my birthday too – sounds like a proper housewife present, but OMG I’m desperate for one! And they’re so expensive, they really are a ‘big birthday’ sort of present 😊

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AD | Contemporary floors to brighten a room on a budget

*** This is a sponsored post ***

You can dress up your home with new flooring even on fixed budget. These low-cost flooring ideas will help brighten and lift your home. 

If you're looking to re-do the floors in your kitchen, living room, bedroom or bathroom, there's lots of options to chose from, and what's more the ideas below can be quite purse-friendly too 😊

1. Sheet Vinyl Flooring

>Advantage: There are a lot of choices that have the same appearance like wood and stone. 

It's very durable and water resistant. It is easy to clean. It can help disguise crooked subfloors. It's a pretty budget-friendly option.

>Disadvantage: The colour may fade. It can be hard to fix.

2. Luxury Vinyl Planks

>Advantage: The floors will look like natural wood or stone without being too an expensive.

It's easy to install on different subfloors. It is smooth to stand or walk on.

>Disadvantage:  It's not made from recycled materials, so it’s not an eco-friendly option. Luxury vinyl colour may fade from too much sunlight. It can be easily scratched from sharp objects.

3. Laminate Flooring

>Advantage: There are so many laminate flooring choices to select from that look like hardwood, cement and stone flooring. It is easy to install and snap together. The colour will not fade from sunlight. It is low maintenance and easy to clean. 

>Disadvantage: Laminate doesn't sound the same as hardwood to walk on. Some laminates are made of formaldehyde and can release VOCs. 

4. Builder’s Grade Hardwood Flooring

>Advantage: It is 100% solid wood flooring. The texture feels warm and natural. Your home resale value will be improved. It is low maintenance and easy to clean. It looks great in any theme or decor of your home.

>Disadvantage: Usually it has knots, holes and other defects in the boards, although some people will like that. Some parts of the board are broken and un-usable. 

5. Ceramic Tile

>Advantage: It is very water resistant. It is very strong and durable. It is easy to maintain and clean. It has so many amazing designs to select from. 

>Disadvantage: The texture is hard and feels cold. It is hard to install. Unglazed tiles require sealing. If you drop something heavy on them, they can crack.

Personally, I really have a thing for floors, mostly tiles. I'm already planning to re-do our downstairs bathroom, there'll be lots of fancy tiles in there both on the floor and on the walls, and a new white bathroom suite - hmm, think I'll have to make a Pinterest board for that :) 

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When memories of jam tarts aren't all that they seem

Creative Commons licence, image source here

I’m sat here listening to mums funeral song on repeat, Imagine by John Lennon. I’m feeling the need to connect to mums memory more, and although this evokes really strong emotions for me (usually tears), sometimes I really need to listen to it... lots.

Today while chatting to a family member, I had a memory come back, all because of the words ‘jam tarts’.

When I was 3 or 4, mum used to take me to a play group/nursery for a couple mornings a week. I loved it there. This one day we made jam tarts, and I can remember it so vividly, I can see the room layout, the pale blue colour of the kitchen and the worn wooden floor. I’m sat at the table making the pastry. We cut out circles and put them in the baking tin, and spoon jam into them (red jam and orange jam – I imagine its strawberry and apricot). I loved making them, it’s my first memory of baking anything.

We clean ourselves up and go play in the hall. Then later, when it’s time to go home, I see mum walking up the steps into the hall, and one of the nursery staff hands me an open tub with my jam tarts in, and I’m immediately mortified, they’re burnt. It’s my fault, I must have burnt them. I feel so guilty that the first thing I’ve cooked for mum I’ve burnt, I literally feel ashamed.

I have no memory of eating them, or mum eating them, so maybe they went in the bin. But as I’m typing this I’m filled with that guilt of ruining them. And it’s only now the memory has come back, that I realise it wasn’t my fault at all, I didn’t put them in the oven or take them out, I was too young to do any of that. But that 3 year old Georgina didn’t put those thoughts and realisations together, I felt like it was my fault, I made the mistake.

That then led me to think about my own children, and when I’ve made things with them (namely Squidge) and he’s gotten upset because maybe things didn’t go perfectly. He must have felt like I did, like it was his fault, when it’s not at all, not in the slightest. The world is such a different place when you’re that little.

Sometimes life can really surprise you.

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